Here are some more "Darts and Pats!" They are old but still amusing!
A “way-to-counter-the-rotation-of-the-earth” pat to the girl who walked around in circles to try to make the room stop spinning one late night.
From your roommate, who admires your logic.
A “thanks-for-entertaining-me-with-your-melodrama” dart to the girl outside my apartment window who was yelling and sobbing relentlessly while fighting with her boyfriend on Thursday evening.
From a girl who thinks you should learn how to chill out and act civilized, or at the least wait until you are indoors before you verbally attack your boyfriend.
A “grow-a-set-of-balls” dart to the guy who was being screamed at and cried on by his girlfriend outside my apartment window on Thursday evening.
From a girl who heard the entire thing and thinks that you should know better and have more self respect than to put up with such crap.
A "where-are-your-standards?" dart to the girl who got mad and yelled at me after I wouldn’t have sex with her after knowing her for two hours.
From a sophomore guy who thinks you need to get your priorities straight.
A "you-think-you’re-so-funny" dart to the girl who asked me to pull her finger and then farted on our first date.
From a shocked guy who acted like he was going to the bathroom and then left you at the restaurant — with the bill.
A "you-should-always-watch-where-you-are-walking" pat to the bodybuilder that ran into a pole in D-Hall while staring at some lovely ladies.
From your friend that almost fell over laughing while you tried to play it off and is sure you made a great impression.
A "you-should-at-least-have-used-your-own-dorm" dart to the drunk freshman who took a dump in our shower and peed in our hall.
From very angry sophomores who didn’t enjoy the mess and feel that it isn’t the housekeepers’ job to take care of your mess because you are incompetent.